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How to be More Social and Ease into Conversations

Priya Johnson Dec 11, 2019
Ever so often we find ourselves standing next to someone, struggling to ease into a conversation! While we realize we don't live our lives in isolation, our socially anxious minds seem to be pulling us the other way.
Me : Hi
Them: Hi
Me :
Them:
Me:
Them:
Me:
Them:
Me: Ok, so I’ll just leave now
-Unknown

Be Genuine

Even people meeting us for the first time can sense a facade, so be genuine. Don’t try to be someone you’re not.
"After hello, I’m usually out of things to say." - Anonymous

Conversation Starters

Look around and use whatever is around you to start a conversation. Sometimes the weather, current affairs, hobbies, etc. make good ice breakers.
"That awkward moment when you don’t know how to continue a conversation." - Unknown

Conversation Builders

It’s not necessary to spearhead the conversation every time. Build on what the opposite party has started and you’ll ease your way into the conversation.
Friendship is born at that moment, when one person says to another, “What, you too? I thought I was the only one.” - C.S Lewis

Common Denominator

As you speak to people, you’ll find something common. Use similar stages in life, challenges, hobbies, etc. as common denominators to bond over.
Politeness is an inexpensive way of making friends - William Feather

Be Mindful

As rust is to metal, callous words are to interpersonal bonds. Steer clear of sensitive areas and don’t pry about things that will make the person uncomfortable.
"Never judge others, you never really know the depth of their scar." - Unknown

Be Empathetic

People have their own burdens and baggage, and even if you haven’t been in a similar situation, empathize with them. Avoid judgement and unsolicited advice.
"The most important thing in a conversation is hearing what isn’t said." - Peter Drucker

Avoid Bragging

While we love talking about our accomplishments, avoid boasting during your conversation. Bragging pushes people away.
"The great thing about new friends is that they bring new energy to the soul." - Unknown

Be Open to Making New Friends

A closed attitude is detrimental to healthy relationships. Don’t shut new people out and don’t confine yourself to a certain group of friends.
Saying “Hello”, “Good morning”, or a “Kind Word” will not cause brain damage. - Ty Howard

Show Recognition

A nod or smile goes a long way, so the next time you walk past people acknowledge their presence.
‘Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.’ - William Arthur Ward

Don’t Forget to Say Thank You

Thanking the people who’ve helped you makes them feel appreciated. This simple sign of gratitude will strengthen your social life.
"Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting. - Joyce Meyer

Be Patient

It takes time and conscious effort to bring about a change in our personality. Take one conversation at a time. The more you work on your social skills, the better they will get.
“Good conversation is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.” - Anne Morrow Lindbergh